Thursday, 23 October 2008

Things that Rock Thursday

The whole idea of this day-of-the-week thing was to choose something deliberately positive. But today? Sorry, no can do.

Some bits of news have been dripping through for the last week that some of the rules for UK adoptions were changing. Just before we left for our holiday, we found out that our trip to Ethiopia was going to have to be about a month long in order for us to be present at the court hearing and complete three separate sets of of paperwork. And obviously we're also going to need time at home as a family before J goes back to work, so... this is not trivial. But now. We've just found out (a few hours ago) that, due to some rule changes, all UK adoptions now need to be totally independent. They were always semi-independent, which was stinky enough, frankly, but now we feel like we're in total limbo. The worst part is that we're now going to have to make two trips to Ethiopia, with the first being a trip to identify a child. I just can't tell you how much I don't want to do that. How are we supposed to pick our future son or daughter? What possible criteria can there be? The child who is cutest? The youngest? The one with the best hair? The one you feel most sorry for?

I can't really wrap my head around this.

This week has also been pretty awful for other reasons that are too boring to go into (although if you thought birth announcements, pregnancy announcements, travel for work and unexpected new urgent work projects, as well as houseguests galore, you wouldn't be too far out). Today I don't think anything rocks. Sorry.


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  2. How exactly do you "choose" a child? Are there orphanages with available children waiting to be chosen?

    (It's totally different here in the states- we're simply referred a child based on our preferances and our social worker's suggestion). I can't even imagine choosing a child- I'd want to choose them all?!

    (sorry- my first comment had a typo that totally changed the meaning of what I wanted to say. I guess I should proof-read better!)

  3. Oh my dear friend. My heart hurts with you. This is a hard thing to hear...I imagine your heart is wrestling with it all. I don't have many words, just prayers for you. I pray you will see God's kindness and feel him lifting you up and giving you guidance and comfort. You are in a long and hard labor my friend. with lots of love for you,

  4. Holy cow! What difficult news to learn. I am sorry that you have gotten such bad news lately. We are thinking of you over here in Boston and sending you good vibes!

  5. Oh man, I am sorry to read that yesterday was so pitiful. I cannot believe the Ethiopia adoption changes in the UK. Can you still obtain decent, trustworthy assistance with an independant adoption?

    I hope you can still find the strength to proceed...I'm going back now to read your Friday post.


  6. I read this the day you wrote it and just didn't know what to say. I'm so sorry for how difficult this process is. I'd heard about the different rules in the UK, but I had no idea until following your story. Independent adoptions are actually really frowned upon here in the US, so that's really something that this is what you're being forced to do. I can't imagine.
    I don't want to be trite or give niceties--however, I don't know how we would have made it through our adoption without our faith. Hold on to that. That's all I know to say. Oh, and know that you've got a team of people out here in the blogging world who are not just cheering you on, but praying for your family.


Over to you!