Saturday, 3 March 2012

Still

I am still sick. I'm about to enter week six of a low-grade but beastly virus and I feel utterly depleted. 
Yes, I am solely responsible for the existence of MRSA. 

I want to say something profound about this experience but really, there is nothing profound about mucus. 

I am just so tired. We have our annual church day of prayer tomorrow and I have never felt less like praying. I know that the less I want to pray, the more I need to pray, but I'm worried that the moment I close my eyes I'll fall asleep and snore. Also - speaking seriously - at the moment I am finding it so hard to deal, spiritually, with the chronic discouragement of the everyday. I have wrestled with God over Big Things several times in my life and always come out so much stronger in my faith, so much closer to Him. But thorns like this lingering virus and attendant exhaustion and the thousand tiny inconsequential dramas  of life seem to shred my soul in a way that nothing else does. I need to take my eyes of myself and focus on Jesus but I'm struggling. Those of you who are Christians - if you want to pray for me, please pray about this. 

On the plus side, my hair is still bouncy, thanks to the ministrations of my wonder gadget. Several of you have asked for proof so - it's surprisingly hard to take a picture of your own hair, but here it is.  This picture is only impressive if you know what a frizzball I usually am, so you're going to have to take my word that for me, this is as sleek as it gets.  

What? You want my autograph because you think someone this glamorous must be famous? No problem. Five bucks. 

Anyway.  I'm half-way through a book review that I want to share here, but I'm too fuzzy-headed to do it justice tonight. And seriously, people. It's eight thirty. 

I'm going to take some more drugs, and then I'm going to bed. 

21 comments:

  1. WOW, your hair is gorgeous! Lovely and sleek.

    At least you look good?

    KIDDING! Of course I'll pray for you and is it such a bad thing if you fall asleep? God will speak to you in your dreams!

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    1. HEH! The dreams I've been having since I upped this medication? Weird. Sometimes violent. Probably not really what God is trying to say to me :)

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  2. I struggle the same way - big things, I can tackle. Everyday crap, wears me out. We were sick this week too. The toll feeling to tired to be a good parent puts on your psyche is very real.
    Hang in there.
    With that hair just one look in the mirror followed by a quick hair-flip and a jaunty shake, you should be feeling better in no time.

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    1. flickin' it now, SFM, flickin' it now.

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  3. Duuude. I was cursed with The Mucus for half of October and November, and I seriously wanted to throw myself off a bridge. It gets better? So sorry.

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    1. glad you managed not to throw yourself off that bridge, K!

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  4. Sorry you're so sick, that is rubbish. Your hair looks great!!!
    Amy x

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  5. Ah Claudia - I'm so sorry to hear that you're still struggling with sickness. There's not much harder than being sick with young children to take care of in addition to yourself. I will pray for you - I'd love to pray for you about these things. And I hope this is the week things start looking a little brighter.

    ANd your hair is gorgeous!!!

    Blessings,

    Ruth

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  6. "The Mucus" is the thing I had last year from Oct-January. It is horrible. Every day slogging through mucus and slight fever and being so so tire. I'm so sorry C! Are the drugs helping? Have you had a z-pack yet? (Not sure what it's actually called but it's the last resort drug for the mucus I think!" Helped me.

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  7. I was sick like this from Christmas until mid January. It was awful. Really awful. I hope you feel better soon. Don't judge yourself or your faith too harshly during this time either- feeling like you suck in all areas of life is the virus talking. Yup.

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  8. Oh Claudia. Sickness that lingers is just do damned draining, it's hard to be able to focus on much else than on how utterly exhausted you are. I promise it will get better, it has to. I just wish I could hocus pocus it to get better NOW.

    Is there anyone who can come help you out for a few days, so you can take some nice uninterrupted naps? That's what I'll pray for, someone can come and lend a hand. If only an ocean weren't between us....

    Gorgeous hair, and that is something!

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  9. It really does help knowing your hair is so beautiful when you have mucus. If you're anything like me though, when I get sinus infections, the tricky part comes in keeping the snot out of the hair.

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    1. You know what? That had never, ever happened to me. UNTIL about ten minutes after I read this comment. And then I looked at my hair and - GROSS! Oh, so gross. So, um, thanks for the warning. I think.

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  10. Hope
    You are feeling better soon!

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  11. I am just wondering about the logistics of nose blowing with that ring. I know, I know. Odd things like that puzzle me. For sure it would end up caught on my nostril or something. I hope I haven't just added to your list of things to fret about.

    Hope you feel better.

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  12. hope you feel better very soon! Love your hair!

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  13. We've been getting through weeks and weeks of low-grade yet highly-annoying sickness in our house, too. Hope you feel better very soon. You and your hair look pretty dang amazing, considering! Love that chandelier, btw...

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  14. feel better soon...keeping you in my thoughts

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  15. Well it's been a while, so hope you are feeling better. Your hair looks fabulous! For some reason this post showed as new in my reader, then I realized I never left a comment anyway so here it is. It is horrible being sick when your children are still running around like every day!

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  16. Thanks very much for well wishes... I am starting ot get better, at LAST. I think. Lots of drugs. And lots of spinach smoothies.

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Over to you!