Friday, 30 July 2010

One Year Old Twins

Are really, really tiring. Lately, I've been falling asleep during their nap out of sheer defeated exhaustion. But not today, dear people, today I have uploaded eleventy bajillion photos instead. And now I'm staring at my screen, totally unable to think of a coherent sentence to describe any of it. There are quite a few more 'oh no, it's time for bed, haven't taken a picture yet' pictures in here than there have been in previous months. That's mostly because the days have felt a lot more intense and difficult lately than they used to be, and I'm spending less time capturing it because frankly, I'm too busy tearing my hair out. And yes, I'm sure you needed to know that. Mostly, they're a waste of pixels but I've left them in because project 365 means project 365, dagnabbit!

In case anybody cares, the thing that is driving me around the bend is feeding. I mean eating. Actually I no longer have any idea what I mean - what I mean is the process whereby the children ingest calories in some form or other and end up not starving themselves . Which always sounded really simple, until one of them (Baby I! I'm talking about you!) decided that eating is for sissies and he'd rather not, thank you. And of course it's especially fraught and laden when children have already been malnourished once.They used to eat pretty well. I made homemade food for them (because I'm cheap, not for nutritional reasons), I'd read a bit about Ellyn Satter's divisions of responsibility and basically I thought that I had this stuff licked. I thought I knew a reasonable amount about making it work, but the last few weeks feel like they have chewed me up and spit me out and I realise that I know nothing. NOTHING. Low point was Wednesday when baby I was perfecting his new feeding scream of death. It's high, scratchy and then rapidly drops in pitch and volume - it sounds for all the world like he is being pushed off a cliff. I keep expecting to hear a splash at the end, or at the very least the ring of the doorbell because the neighbours have finally called social services on us. This scream comes out whenever I put a spoonful of food near him - not forcing him to eat it, just offering it to him. And then there are tears. And I know he must be hungry, and it's food he's eaten before, but it's just tears and screaming. Reading that, it doesnt' sound like too big a deal - nothing a bit of friendly feeding advice wouldn't sort out. (But please don't. Seriously - don't). But on Wednesday I felt like I JUST COULDNT' TAKE IT ANYMORE and I decided that I needed this book RIGHT NOW. So I went inside, ordered it from Amazon, all ready to pay next day delivery, found out it was on one-week back order and burst into tears of my own. My sister will verify that I came within an inch of calling her in the middle of the night, her time, so that she could read bits out to me from her copy. (I know that I have fixated on this book way too much, by the way, but it's my hope object at the moment so if you don't like it, I dont' need to know right now).

So anyway. That's why I'm feeling a bit fragile. Here are the photos.

Despite these outfits, we are often asked 'is it two boys ?' I'm thinking that if it's two boys, we don't like one of them very much.
This was a good day.

(So was this one)

Oh, I wish that I had a spoon.
Now, I have the object of my desire. And yet it seems that happiness still eludes me.

ice cubes! (just in case you thought she was eating plastic)

looking at this boy's arrangement of chins, it's hard to believe that he's on hunger strike. But he is. Oh, yes, he is. How can someone so adorable be so utterly frustrating? It's the question of the ages.

mummy, this is what I think of your dancing.

I got a wide angle lens for my birthday. I really like it.

I don't want him ever, ever to grow out of doing this. It almost makes up for the hunger strike. Almost.

Trial run of birthday cupcakes (yes! They're baked in the cone!)
Mummy, Ellyn Satter called. She thinks you're a loser.


(The photos that follow are all from their birthday gathering on the day after their party. I have indulged myself with quite a few, because hey, you only turn one once).

here they are again (a different batch - we finished that first batch in about 2 days)
and here are two more batches of a different flavour (passionfruit and marshmallow - tasty but unattractive)
baby boy discovers cake icing. He hasn't looked back. It's the exception to the hunger strike. He's flopped forward to be at one with the icing.
Could their birthday outfits (all the way from Texas!!) be any cuter?

one of her smiling
and one of me smiling, which adds up to one good photo
grandparents holding two very sugary children
back to normal life.
you had me at hello
gosh, can you tell that this is one of those end of the day photos I was talking about?
perhaps, mummy, perhaps.


  1. Love your photos, as usual.

    Sorry to hear you are having a hard time. Hope things perk up for you and that little man decides that food is good again.


  2. love the photos! Happy Birthday Sweet Babies! I feel your eating pain. Just when I think eating is going well for us - we have another season of "I don't want to eat" or "there are only two things I will eat!". Right now teething is exacerbating it for us...ugghhh! I hope this season is short for you. One thing that encouraged me was a comment "toddlers are terrible eaters"...well that is true for our little guy and I am just glad sometimes to know he is not the only one in the world that way! Hugs from a fellow Momma :-)

  3. The wide-angle lens pics are really fabulous. If you think you're pulling your hair out now- just wait until they turn 2! ha! :)

  4. I got asked ALL the TIME how old my son was when Elfe first came home...and she's a huge fan of pink as well.

    I have feeding issues too, and also have been trying to remember what my job is (when and what) and what Elfe's job is (how much). But food is so emotional - there's the worry about getting enough food into her given where she comes from, the frustration over planning what I think will be a good meal only to end up feeding most of her portion to the dog (the up side being that I am currently saving a fortune on dog food), there's trying to get past my own early training with food ("clean your plate or there's no dessert"), and just plain letting go of my need to control the situation. It's also really hard for me to understand how someone could be so picky - I am not and have never been (ask my mother, she'll verify it!) a picky eater. Put a plate in front of me and I'll eat whatever is on it. But Elfe won't even eat things that are different shapes (she loves meatballs, won't touch a hamburger) or temperatures (melted cheese on pizza is heaven, regular solid cheese is disgusting), sometimes she doesn't even like the same thing from one day to the next!

    You know, this was a post that I've been intending to write for a while, maybe I just did it here instead...

  5. Love love love the pictures! Your babies are too cute!!! Love your post to as it is so honest and hilarious. I can so understand and relate as well.

    Oh - and I LOVE the birthday outfits. I just ordered mine today as my baby turned 1 yesterday. Yes, I realize I am behind on ordering but the party is next Saturday so I have plenty of time. Ha ha.

  6. Nice work on the cupcake cones, I was storing up that idea for one of my kids' birthdays. someday.

    When kids don't eat it is THEE most frustrating thing. I hate it. So sorry. I wish you could threaten him with IV nutrition. "Son, I will shove this PICC line into your heart if you don't eat this." Somehow I don't think that's allowed though.

    You look gorgeous. And I am salivating over your wide angle. SALivating.

  7. Wonderful! And thank you for all the hard work uploading. Totally worth it (for us, anyway). Those cupcakes are pretty darned impressive, and make so much more sense after I see that they are the flat-bottomed cake cones, something which did not occur to me when you described them initially. I was picturing pointy-bottomed sugar cones and wondering how you got them packed without wrecking them and then just figured that you had magical balancing abilities or something. Anyhoo, even the cupcakes are not as cute as those babies, not by a long shot. Oh, and the new lens ROCKS. Good work, husband!

  8. LOL um, no, my hair's as bad as ever actually!

    Those babies are gorgeous. Gorgeous! Love the ones with your hubby and baby/ ies in black and white.

    And the eating? I am clinging, CLINGING I tell you, onto what my paed said - over a week they'll have some semblance of balance. And then, there's always milk. Apparently, babies never starve themselves. Hmmm :)

  9. I love the photos!! THe cardboard box one is so cute!!! Good luck wiht the foody thing...

  10. Ack! I have so much to say!!! I'm going to try to remember everything.
    1. If Ariam went on a hunger strike I would be freaking out too. I am traumatized if she even eats half of what she normally has at a meal. I am so so sorry you are going through this!!

    2. Baby I, despite strike, is, how to say politely? Nice and healthy! :) He (the both are) a cutie pie.

    3. I LOVE the frosting situation. Please. I am sure he is striking for frosting. Smart kid.

    4. Can I have the cupcake recipe in cones PLEASE??!!! (email me!)

    5. I am going to pierce Ariam's ears so people will stop asking if she's a boy. SO annoyed by that. She will have to suffer a bit of pain so that we can stop hearing that question. It is the hair I think. Unfortunately Baby L and Ariam both have shorter curls right now. Maybe you can brush them out a bit and stick several bows all over her head?? Of course that would be so helpful!

    There's more. Oh yes, Another question. HOW do you capture the photos of them smiling? Ariam either moves and it is blurry or she won't smile. She always looks so serious in photos. Do you ahve a trick?

    Now this is a mini-book. Sorry!

  11. Your babies, as always, are beautiful. I just love the photos, although after visiting here I end up feeling rotten about my attempts. I keep telling myself it must be the camera. It's not my talent, or lack of talent, of course.

    Don't know what to say about the eating, except I would be freaking out, too. I hope Baby I ends the strike ASAP.

  12. Oh, I just love these photos! Happy birthday babies!! I feel your pain regarding the feeding strike but thankfully, for now, we have moved on here. Now I have the opposite problem and can't get him to stop eating! Hope this phase passes qucikly for you too...though I suspect it's a precursor to the you-know-what two's! :-)

  13. ADORABLE!!! I love them all :)
    I'm so sorry about the feeding issues--I hope it's a temporary thing, as I know you do, too.
    You have another Texas fan/friend who is sending adorable outfits? There are some adorable baby clothes around here :)

  14. Claudia, would you be willing to share the recipe for the ice cream cone birthday cupcakes? How did you get the frosting to look so pretty and ice cream like?

  15. Your blog has exceeded the Blogger cuteness allowance !! I absolutely love these pictures and cute captions. Too much!

  16. Hi~I'm Elva from Taiwan.
    I just saw your blog at random~^^
    These photos are so cute!!

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